Why Self-Awareness Alone Isn't Sufficient for Personal Growth?

Understanding Self-Awareness: The First Step, Not the Only One

Imagine you possess a clear understanding of why a particular aspect of your life leaves you unfulfilled. You can articulate your motivations and recognize the actions you take, even when they contradict your deepest desires.

The Question Remains: Why Aren't You Moving Forward?

Despite this insight, progress feels elusive. This raises an important question: why does self-awareness alone fall short in driving personal growth?

I'll start with an example . A use case based on my own journey. The case - sating sweet things - yes, ice cream, chocolate, cookies you name it. I know and I do realise that these could be harmful for my health on a long run. I often catch myself reaching for these dopamine booster foods in a stressful situations. Maybe I'm addicted to dopamine or do I have a health problem? The truth is that I can avoid eating sweet things (I know how it sounds), but often I just enjoy these and I am used to fight stress in this way.

What had happened?

I went through coaching sessions on healthy eating, I read articles and I understand what the problem is. I have the awareness. I decide that I will change my diet. But what happens? Maybe I will try today and tomorrow. Maybe I will rely on awareness to just do its job. Maybe I will stick to my new plan. Can you guess what happened to me after a month or two? Did the awareness alone helped me? Unfortunately, the answer is no. I will probably start my old eating regimen and beat myself up for my lack of motivation. Or will I do something else?

First of all, I want to mention that awareness is a fundamental part of the psychotherapy and coaching process. However many clients I have worked with say that awareness doesn't do the job. It didn't work for me neither - at least not as a standalone aspect.

Some of you may have read tons of books on how to improve yourself. Others have used ready-made AI recipes. Still others have spent hours of analyzing the situation they are in.

But what truly makes a difference?

Action is the key

What I've noticed is that action leads to more lasting change. The steps. Overcoming fear or the beaten path and doing something different. Doing it, despite the inner voice that tells you it can't be done or that you can't. That's when progress happens, new possibilities open up.

How do we actually take these first steps?

For each of you, the motivation and process will be different. Still, there are a few things that work without fail. Thinking and reflecting help, but they can't do the action for us. Try them out and let me know what you think. :)

1. Support . I talked about healthy habits. How many of you have been motivated to go to the gym on your own for a long time? And how many of you have gone to the gym with a friend, neighbor, colleague or personal trainer? It's different when we have the support or the gentle nudge from the side, right? This is not about motivation, but about nudge and purposeful action.

   
   

2. Overcoming Fear . We are often stuck in a rut because of awareness, motivation, and fear. The fear that is ingrained in us, sometimes we don't even realize it. Fear that has gripped us since we were children. What if we imagined that we had a medicine that made fear go away, at least today, at least for a little while? Maybe:

   • You will be able to tell your manager that you are not happy with the salary, bonus, or attitude.

   • You will let the child play in the muddy puddle and get wet, which will make him smile.

   • You will leave the toxic job that you have long disliked.

   • You will eat a burger without any regrets.

   • You will leave the child until 11:30 PM to take care of the children and eat "cheap" food.

   • You will tell a loved one how you feel.

   • You will leave the place that has not held you for a long time.

   • You will cry and laugh like a child.

     
     

   • -> The list might be extensive. You might say that, despite acknowledging the validity of everything you've read so far, you remain skeptical. I am not encouraging you to be reckless. Even though think about the steps again and ...

3. Just do it now. 

I heard that sentence during a program I attended. The lecturer emphasized that there is no perfect time, and we must make room for our goals or desires. This idea strongly aligns with everything discussed so far. We often go to great lengths to delay or minimize the "threat." Sometimes, we genuinely lack the time or energy. But is that truly the case, or do we simply choose to delay the discomfort of change?

Personal experience

When it comes to my healthy eating habits, I follow these guidelines: I don't restrict myself entirely, but my initial move was to stop having dessert after dinner. It's a minor change, not a drastic one, but for me, it was more about breaking a "rewarding" habit. It's a small step that I began today, starting tonight. Perhaps you, as you read this, will feel inspired to take your first step toward your own important awareness.

Would you dare?

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I hope you gained something from this, even if it's just a small insight. Feel free to reach out if you've already tried any of the suggestions I've mentioned. Don't hesitate!