Or, what is the problem with this sentence, and what should we do to make it really work so that we can discover that magical moment called "me time"?
One of my "favorite" pieces of advice, which I myself had given out in abundance, is "you need to set aside time for yourself." The quotation marks are not because the advice is bad—quite the opposite, it's excellent and perhaps even genuinely refreshing. The quotation marks are there because it implies that the person on the receiving end somehow hasn’t thought to set aside time for themselves and rest. In most cases the tired working mom is fully aware that she needs to recharge, but this advice simply doesn’t work, or at least not effectively enough.
Often, the question that people seek answers to is, "How should I find time for myself when I’m already running out of time?" or "Why do others manage it, and I don’t?" And so, overwhelmed with tasks and to do lists, that magical moment called "me time" often gets pushed to the background. On top of it, we feel guilty for our poor self-care and wellbeing.
Why is it difficult?
Time.
Because time is, first and foremost, time, and it is limited—we have 24 hours in a day, certain hours for work, a need for sleep, and no matter how much we want, the time frame cannot be magically shifted.
The words are arranged incorrectly.
Because finding time for yourself implies that it will somehow appear from outside. Finding suggests that those 2 hours, 2 days, or 2 months of rest will appear from somewhere, like a gift from someone. Unfortunately, practice shows that this rarely happens, and even if someone advises us to find time for ourselves, there are still things beneath the surface that hold us back.
So, what should we do?
Replace the words "find time for myself."
If you replace this words with "take time for myself" or "steal a few minutes time for myself," then more possibilities open up mentally, because you can consciously prioritize yourself.
How do we achieve it?
Time cannot stop, but the only thing you can do is stop yourself for a minute, an hour, or a day. And since we live in a world of continuous invisible competition about who and how well they are managing, it’s good to think about how, from your personal perspective and situation, you could take your time for yourself.
Because ultimately, is "me time" important? Undoubtedly. Does it mean 2 hours of massage or just 2 minutes of listening to a favourite song? Certainly. To achieve it, it might be useful to first think about why you would want to fit it into your schedule? Your "why" is very important, and you can start with it.
I am not an expert on your life (not to mention I’m not an expert on my own). What I have is a small child, a husband, accreditation with the International Coaching Federation, a positive attitude, extensive corporate experience in learning and development, and empathy. So, if you’d like to explore this topic, I can support you through a conversation in a secure and confidential environment to see what can be adjusted so you can find your "me time." Whether and how you achieve this depends on you, but I will be around to help you map out your working strategy.
And finally, according to some experts, if you manage to make your bed in the morning, you have already checked off "a positive start to the day and me time." Sometimes it can be as simple as that. 😊